Anything you can do, I can do better!

What to do when your baby doesn't stop crying

When your baby doesn't stop crying, there are some key strategic ways of responding:

1. Do not run away, you can't avoid the problem or Social Services and your mother will be after you.
2. Remain calm, the baby can tell if you are frustrated and will join in.
3. Try holding in different positions.
4. See if the noise of running water or a washer/dryer will soothe.
5. Swaddle or try to put in a dark place to remove visual stimulation.
6. Gas Relief Medicine, Gripe Water, or Colic Calm to soothe the stomach.
7. Face the baby away from you so the pressure is off the chest and stomach.
8. Go for a walk, the motion is familiar from 9 months of living in a human washing machine.
9. Try a rocker, swing, cradle, or bounce while walking around.
10. DON'T GIVE UP! You can do this! Your baby needs your love and affection more than anything else. Call people. Use forums online. Keep trying new things. Get creative. Invite a friend over to try something different.

The reason I suggest these remedies is Jamin has decided to be very fussy in the evenings. We have tried many things and only sometimes they work. Sometimes it has to do with eating and we've received some helpful advice on that and are going forward with it. But when it's not about eating specifically, it seems like he just wants to be held and moving. It is a mystery. But, like #10, I think we can get through not by frustration and anger, but persistence, creativity, and using all of our resources.
And pray.

3 .5 Weeks old!

Our lil' grapefrut is now 3 weeks, 5 days old. I called him a lil' grapefruit when he was floating in fluid 5 months ago or so because his little home, we were told, was about the size of a grapefruit. Thankfully that stage of anticipation is over. But then there aren't many stages of life that do not inv0lve anticipation. Some people look forward to the 5pm or the weekend. Some people look forward to graduation or marriage or a better job opportunity.

In our new world Christine and I sometimes call Babyland we look forward to many things we were not really expecting. First night of 6 hours of sleep straight! That's a big one. First words, first crawl, first walking, first birthday... These are all great things.

Then I look back at the last month or so. He was smiling in his first week. He giggled at 7 days. And he had his first diaper blowout a week ago! But more than anything we are seeing how fast he is growing. How quickly he is changing. How much joy there is in being a parent.

Christine said to me the other day how we can take pictures, we can take video, and I even recorded his hiccups last night because they were so cute. But we can never capture the emotions we have when we are holding him and he looks up at us and is so content. We can't envelop the joy of picking him up when he's crying and all his fears are gone and we are his rescue.

Sleep is difficult to come by. Free time is no longer quite as free. And in case anyone ever doubted it, being a stay at home mom is WORK. But there is a satisfaction in the midst of the difficult times that the sacrifices I am making now for this little life are emotional investments that I may never fully comprehend, but which are life-changing and life-motivating. And that is why being a mom and being a dad- giving life and living in that life- can almost never be matched.

Smiling

In an in and out state of sleep, Jamin decided to smile

Here's another classic outtake at about the 50 sec. mark:

MY SON HAS BEEN BORN

His name is Jamin Terry Bekins (pr. JAY-minn). Terry is his grandpa Jensen's name. Bekins is his grandpa Bekins name, and Jamin has a Hebrew meaning of right hand (think Benjamin, son of the right hand).

He was 7 lbs 4oz at birth.
He was 19 inches long, but at the Pediatrician, he was 20.5 inches, so I think we'll go by that length.

















Other cool details:
6 hours of labor, starting with contractions 3-4 minutes apart. 2.5 minutes apart at 4 hours and 8cm dialated. Pushed for 1 hour. Lots of pain, natural birth. Amazing strength in the woman I married!
I have fallen in love with her all over again this week watching the way she pours her love into him!

We still aren't getting a lot of sleep, and it's been pretty difficult to adjust to nursing, but Jamin seems to be very content, doesn't cry that much (yet). He might when he get's older.

















ADVICE FOR OTHER NEW DADS:
Be emotionally present for the love of your life.
Be active and help in every area you can.
Take lots of pictures and video, this stage doesn't last forever.
Last, stay positive.

Are you a Sniff, a Scurry, a Hem, or a Haw?

I just read a great book today (audio book from audible.com) called Who Moved My Cheese? Only 1.5hrs to read, it's about 2 mice Sniff and Scurry and 2 little people the size of mice Hem and Haw in a maze. It really focuses on how we adapt, react, prepare and approach CHANGE.
Well, I am gripping tightly onto Hem's idea (going with what I know to be comfortable), while desperately trying to find a way to seek out change so that I can be home more with Christine and _____, not telling yet!!

So I'd rather be a Haw, where I learn to prepare for change and accept it and think about it and move towards it by painting a better picture in my mind than the fear that so easily overcomes me. Plenty of fear going into having a baby, but more reward if I can be prepared and think in a new way. IT'S MAZE TIME!!!

Also here's the audio version I listened to:

If you were a superhero, what power would you have?

I know my title is kind of random today, but I was actually thinking this afternoon about how vulnerable I am, how little control over situations I really have, and just as the Burgesses reminded us Sunday night, how comforting it is to know that God is sovereign. I would want my superhero power to be protecting my family. That would be quite a power. And considering some of the suffering we've seen in Haiti over the last few weeks, I'm asking a lot to protect.

Today we found out our little boy is on track for a healthy size after all. As we found out yesterday, the measurement of his belly was smaller than two weeks ago, but that does not matter as much as his actual size. The ultrasound today revealed that he is right on track and is in the 70th percentile in weight for his age. Good job, son! 18lbs. 6 oz. NOT REALLY. 5 lbs. 15 oz. Really.

The best part was seeing his mouth and nose this time. SO clear. He was opening his mouth and licking. Very cute. Almost as cute as his cousin Jack's super-baby strength of doing a push-up and turning his head over. Check it out at http://www.vanwingerdens.blogspot.com/

Our Hiding Baby

I think we got our first dose of reality today when we found out that not every baby has a perfect pregnancy. Our midwife measured Christine's stomach today and found it to be 31cm. It was 33cm two weeks ago and should have been closer to 35cm. I'm not especially panicked about this size issue because I know that she has been growing (just in the tummy), and even in the last few weeks. BUT, there is a slight possibility there is something going on. We can't worry about this until we know more information.
He might be lower.
He might be more to the side.
He might even be hiding further back. Seriously.
They scheduled an appointment for Tuesday to have an ultrasound and measure more accurately. That will answer our questions and comfort our minds.

So remember kids, when you hide from your mommy or daddy, they aren't having fun.

Baby Room Pictures

With less than 2 months to go, I finally made the time to finish up the painting in the baby's room. The planning was done in September, the paint was bought in October, the top and bottom colors were painted in December, and the Ribbon was completed in January. At this rate, we'll have to postpone having the boy till August!

We found this great picture in pottery barn or another magazine similar to it and we were INSPIRED. So I did it.

Our Baby room...

This was put in at the last minute because I wasn't sure what to do with such a small space-

My favorite looking loop and it's behind the door!